Tuesday, February 18, 2014

Fashioning My Cyber Microcosm: I *Should* Be Happy.

Life is once again taking a turn for the stay-up-all-night stressful.

I was volunteering for an admin job in the hopes that I might be hired on, but because I'm not a citizen of the U.S. I didn't make the cut.

So, yeah, I was a little crushed by having spent all the time volunteering my hours for naught. At the very least, it's a good thing to put onto my absolutely pathetic resume, which has been reviewed by everyone I trust or hired to do so when I went to get my GED (yeah, that's right, I am a high school drop out)
No one can manage to make me seem impressive on paper. I am pleased to see it's at least a page with normal text, as opposed to half a page.

Though as frequently as having my hopes dashed occurs, it still manages to make me blue. My mother has been saying "things happen for a reason" or "good things happen eventually" so often, I'm surprised she hasn't lost her voice.

We received a bit of "good news", though I haven't been able to be excited about it because of the enormous underlying problems that entail it.
My husband was accepted for another job in another state-- New Mexico to be exact.
Most people looked at us wide-eyed as if they'd never see us alive again, and "wished us well".
New Mexico does have a shady reputation... but at least it's not Hellbrook... right? (famous last words)

We're moving to another town; double the size of Holbrook, but much much more isolated. It would take much longer to visit a city than it does here. There are literally signs on the stretches of highway before the town, that warn drivers to fill up, lest you breakdown where you can't even see a flicker of light from a distant farm for miles upon miles in any direction-- not unlike here.

Since it's a bigger town, it means more opportunity for me to work, meaning we can actually pay off debt as opposed to just treading water with it... which I am all too thrilled at the prospect of. However (and I really hate that there's a 'however')... the clause is that the town is suffering a rental shortage. All the rent prices are practically gouged, but we would attempt to pay it... if there was any availability that I could find in the near future...

If that wasn't enough, there are many more very real issues that need addressing once and if we do find a place; issues that have the possibility of concerning my physical safety, and the financial repercussions of ensuring it to solve them.
Hopefully we find the ideal place so we don't have to worry about those issues...

The main concern right now is finding a place, because if we don't, then suddenly this bit of news will be just like the rest: a crumbled hope.

P.S. For those wondering about the past announcement I made that I was moving, and wondering what happened, here's the scoop.
Before the Government shut down, many federal sections went through budget cuts; a sequestration. National Parks were among the first to receive them. This meant that, among other things, anyone hoping to get hired on in other places were suddenly told 'no'. We were part of the unlucky few who were told that. It's a simple and complicated as that.

13 comments:

  1. I hope it all works out for you! Things being up in the air are so stressful! At least volunteering looks good on your resume, I am looking into doing a little more myself! I kept putting it off thinking I would get a real job, but since that still hasn't happened might as well volunteer! :P

    Good luck! I will be sending you good thoughts!

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    1. Yeah, it does look good, and it's the only thing keeping me from being angry about that situation, hehe. I wish they would've told me my permanent resident status wouldn't be worth anything sooner than later, though.

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  2. I keep my fingers crossed for you. Not only because a job means money, but also because it is nice to feel needed and valued by someone who is not family or friend...

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    1. It's true-- I'm very very tired of being a "homemaker". It's not as gratifying as earning a check and being part of the big reason those debt numbers go down.

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  3. Oh boy. What a complicated basket of YAYs and OH NOs! Here's hoping that everything works out and you both fall on your feet with smiles on your faces. It must be an East Coast thing, forgive me if I sound incredibly ignorant, why is New Mexico dangerous? I know about the immigration craziness and the high drug-related crime in certain areas, but isn't that everywhere in the Southwest? Like I said, forgive my ignorance. You know us NYers, the sun rises and sets on NYC. HA!

    Like I said, GOOD LUCK! I'm sending you guys some good mojo and crossing my fingers.

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    1. Yeah, I believe it is all SW, and everyone from the other SW states tell me New Mexico is far worse in the frequency of kidnappings and other illicit trades than the rest.
      I can't be sure except for all the hearsay, so I am keeping it under advice but taking it with a grain of salt. Though trekking through a less than perfect neighborhood at 10pm, just lil' ole me who doesn't know how to drive, does pose a potential problem-- in any city. So we either find a place near the central part of town where all the jobs are, or we try and figure out if we could afford me going on insurance along with an extremely inflated apartment price and learn to drive our only vehicle... there's another issue that could put a kibosh with even that, too.

      But geez, it's a huge web of what if's until we find that place.

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  4. The proverbial fork in the road. I understand your hesitation and anxiety about it. But I have to say, you seem to have hated where you live for quite a while, so I can only see good things coming from a move.
    Best of luck!

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    1. I mean, it's trading one tiny town for a small town; it's a step up, but not a huge one.
      The rental crisis might end up putting a kibosh on the entire prospect of moving, depsite my husband's job being a sure thing over there. Plus, it entails just a mess of other problems, mainly financial, and the point of moving is to ensure some sort of monetary increase. I would be supplying the increase to the household, because my husband's new job is exactly like his current one; same pay, different hours... and if I didn't work, we would surely sink under-- that new town is more expensive than the city of Phoenix! I just can't believe how expensive. We're taking a huge gamble.

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  5. Hm...it's kinda two-sided...I mean, congrats on the new job, but it comes with such a downside...I hope you'll find a good apartment and a job too especially because if the place is in the middle of nowhere with no decent infrastructure, you'll be spending quite some time at home otherwise...:/

    Volunteering looks good on your resume, indeed, employers like people, who volunteer because they're more suspectible to find things to do themselves or to work overtime...anyway, I wish you best of luck, I'm sure you'll find something soon and I hope you'll both like the new place. :)

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    1. The thing is, when and if we move to the new town, I am giving up being able to be a homemaker. We simply wouldn't be able to afford this lifestyle in the other town. I need to work, but I need our place to be close to all the jobs, otherwise I could be putting myself in danger when cycling home at night through neighborhoods that don't have street lights-- assuming the only place we find is in the less than pretty side of town. We can't afford another car, and we're not sure yet whether my husband is using the only vehicle for work. The likelihood is pointing to yes unfortunately, so we really need to prevent any issues by finding the perfect place.

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  6. So if you can't find a place to rent, what happens then? Do they force your husband to take the job or do you just stay in Hellbrook? Ugh, why can't these big life changes ever be easy, eh?

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    1. Well, they could plop us into a motel and shove our stuff into storage for who knows how long until something becomes available... but we could also turn it down entirely still, which would be equally disappointing.
      The prospect of living in a motel for months is really grim, though.

      Or at least for life to not put up such high obstacles, because honestly a place like this, victory won't be as sweet tasting-- I would say it's not even worth the trouble, if I wasn't coming from Hellbrook.

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  7. Good luck! I hope everything comes together for you.

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